I have been asking… No – BEGGING for mentors for a while now.
What I found is that, because I didn’t want to look stupid or have people find out that I’m a fraud, I’ve done my best to make it look like I don’t need help. Until recently, I had always tried to be sure that I was the smartest person in the room… Or at least to look like it.
And part of the price for me looking perfect was me never having mentors. Whenever a mentor steps up, the first thing that I do is look for faults or flaws. Because I have this idea that a mentor has to be perfect to be a mentor.
Actually, I had set the bar pretty high in my life. Too high for many of my friends and family to measure up to. It has cost me a lot in terms of personal relationships over the years.
What I am finding as I’ve been developing discipline in my life, is that champions are made – not born. It’s a simple idea that I’ve heard spoken before, and I really didn’t get it until recently.
I Decided to Step Up My Game
I decided to try something I had never tried before… Following instructions. And for me that was a challenging thing. Because, as the smartest person in any room, I was supposed to know it all, and if I knew it all I didn’t need instructions.
So I picked up the book Think and Grow Rich. I had read this book a couple of times before and really didn’t get much out of it other than more knowledge. In one of my previous blogs, I shared a little bit about that. I have also shared a little bit about my experience once I decided to implement the exercise at the end of the autosuggestion chapter. (Every single night for a year, with the exception of maybe 10 nights, I read that chapter out loud.)
At times, it was boring and tedious. I didn’t like it! And it was exactly what I needed to do to develop discipline.
As a result of my dedication and determination, all sorts of things in my life began to shift. Suddenly, I created a spreadsheet and started tracking my money. I had never been able to budget before. I had no interest in it. When the times were good, I didn’t care. When I didn’t have the money, I believed I didn’t have enough to budget.
But now with the advent of my newfound discipline, still not even understanding really what that was, I stepped into a new way of engaging with life.
The results have been nothing short of miraculous!
“All of a sudden,” after six months of reading this blasted chapter out loud every night over and over, I started creating a morning schedule, developing a weekly budget, and, “out of the blue,” meeting mentors.
The people I started meeting were just as successful as the people that I had met in the past. However, when I heard the track start to run about how they weren’t perfect, I recognized what was going on. I saw that I was beginning to break down the person who was sitting across from me in order to make them less than what I thought they were so that I didn’t feel quite so bad about not being at the same level.
In an instant, I was just about to shut down another mentor when I stopped myself and asked myself to take a look at what was really going on.
Thank goodness I didn’t shut him down!
Because six months later I am now in the company of champions
I am now playing with people know how to make it happen. And it’s not as complicated as I was trying to make it.
For example, I was watching a football training video of a guy who was working with a Personal Trainer to achieve his goals. He filmed some of the sessions, and, let me tell you the things that he was doing were unnatural.
And yet, he was doing them. It was a testament to his determination, dedication, and perseverance. You couldn’t tell him it couldn’t be done. He just needed to see that one other person in the world could do it and he would follow suit. No… He would surpass!
The beautiful thing is I get to work with him on a project that is making a HUGE difference in the lives of young men and women who have little hope where they come from.
I have been stopping myself
As I start to hear excuses about how I can’t measure up and I can’t accomplish this and I can’t do that because I don’t have enough of this or I am not enough of that, I think of that guy.
This guy, with a 1.2 GPA weighing only 170 pounds, was able to build up to 220 pounds, improve his grades, and get 24 college scholarships to be a starting quarterback! So, what excuse do I have with 3 degrees and 20 years experience?!?
With the wind knocked out of my ego’s sails, I went about creating plan to overcome my self-sabotage. I knew that I had to start someplace to figure it out. I had no idea what I was doing, but I knew where I wanted to go.
I also know that it’s my determination – my decision – that carries me through. I could continue to feel I am less than these champions. I could say I’ve never trained in athletics. I can say I’ve never played at that level. I could say I never had the opportunities that they had.
But what I see is that it doesn’t matter what age you are when you get started. That it doesn’t matter how far you are from your goal. It only matters that you decide on your goal and decide that your goal is worth your time and energy.
I am amazing in my own right! These champions respect me for who I am and what I’ve accomplished because they understand that it takes something to get where ever you are.
They simply have no time for excuses.
You know where you are right now. You know where you want to go. So make a plan and take it one step – one exercise at a time until you finally find a door – a gate to walk through to get to the other side. I know the price of admission… The price is persistence… decision… perseverance… and I am willing to pay.
What game are you up to? What’s it worth to you? What are you willing to give to achieve?
The difference is a mentor. A coach. Champions never try to go it alone. They always seek the counsel of experts.
Who’s got your back??